patterninverted

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new take on an old feeling by patterninverted, literature

Literature

new take on an old feeling

I think we all have "that" person- The one who, at one point, we were wrapped around like a fig vine. The one who walked away with grace, leaving us to wonder, "what if he'd stayed?" The one we numbed out of our heads and hearts until we thought there was nothing left until the day he comes crashing back into our lives. The one who's past with our pasts combined seems too heavy for the present to hold. The one we can't possibly forgive for daring to live without us. But- Maybe we miss the simple eloquence of attachment. Maybe when we parted ways, we never really "went" anywhere. Maybe instead of him crashing back into our lives, we e

true, everything, i swear by patterninverted, literature

Literature

true, everything, i swear

"look inside for manufacturer's warning and hardware manual." i'm sitting on the concrete floor of my garage reading the labels on boxes in storage. my legs look yellow under the flourescent bulbs. every bruise is outlined. it is one thirty eight in the morning when i finally put out my cigarette and call you back. [ring one] i wonder if i have always been such a narcissist. it had to start somewhere. [ring two] i mouthed the words plenty of times and even spoke them once. i'maliar & i'vealwaysbeenthisway. [ring three] your voice. i rehearsed the speech i would give you. that i am lonely and rail against closure like it has the face o

letters to boys ive loved - 3 by patterninverted, literature

Literature

letters to boys ive loved - 3

c- we became a seething irony when i uncovered the truth about the first time we met, years prior, at the liquor store that employed you. this recognition introduces optimism, like fate was fucking with us, before it excuses it out the backdoor when cynicism joins the party. this recognition ushers in our plan b, our just-in-case, right about the same time you say, i'm not trying to upset you, but... (in other words, enter selfishness, enter neglect, enter reckless abandon, enter you-get-the-idea.) you should be thanking me. i gave you a narrative for your friends when you've ingested too much gin, a story to think about when you're stripp

letters to boys ive loved - 2 by patterninverted, literature

Literature

letters to boys ive loved - 2

d- you are the second "d" that mattered, but i'm writing you first because you're the one who still makes an effort to keep me in your life, even if it is tired and futile. even if i don't really deserve anything from you, because i'm the one that walked away (or didn't walk toward you). take it as it is or whichever way you please. it's safe to say that never really loved you, but my feelings were weighted enough to warrant this letter regardless. there was this one day last summer when you were on the road, i think somewhere in texas, and you were sending me pictures of an arcade that was built to look like a spaceship. it was before i ev

letters to boys ive loved - 1 by patterninverted, literature

Literature

letters to boys ive loved - 1

j- i don't miss you, but i reminisce anyway, because you are the perfect letter-writing type, the person i remember when i'm tipsy and falling asleep and thinking what if? you are not anything special, but you were at least for one night. i have so romanticized you that i have forgotten the way your voice sounds. i have written you so many letters that you will never see. they will end up in an attic or in the trash, because someday, you will be forgotten. perhaps one day i will even look back on this very letter and have to dig deep into my temporal lobe to remember who "j" even is. i am not ready for that yet. there is a mes

this is a letter even if by patterninverted, literature

Literature

this is a letter even if

this isn't the kind of letter that starts off with "dear," because we're not that kind of proper. sometimes i don't think we're any kind of proper, considering the way we crash into each other with even the slightest of disagreements. we're improper because we don't talk about things like love; we prefer to keep our conversations dulled to those of porn and drugs and catalysts. we lay in bed all day smoking cigarettes and having conversations like, "nothing will happen to you if i'm there. i'll protect my baby." (that's you, and it sounds sweet, but it's really kind of cliche.) "what if there's an elephant stampede?" (that's me.) "i'll sho

someday. by patterninverted, literature

Literature

someday.

it's 2:14 in the morning. all i've got for you tonight is a list of things i'm too scared to say. i want to call you right now so i can hear your voice, even if you're a little drunk and can't hold a conversation. i want to hear you breathing through powerlines so i can pretend you're back home and tangled up in these sheets with me. just knowing you're holding me up against your ear makes it that much easier to imagine your lips on my forehead and my cheek on your jawbone. i misswantneed the spidertouch of your fingertips on my spine and your sad kisses goodbye at four in the morning. i'msosadsometimes. you worry that your past is too heav

jezebel in the yard by patterninverted, literature

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new take on an old feeling by patterninverted, literature

Literature

new take on an old feeling

true, everything, i swear by patterninverted, literature

Literature

true, everything, i swear

letters to boys ive loved - 3 by patterninverted, literature

Literature

letters to boys ive loved - 3

letters to boys ive loved - 2 by patterninverted, literature

Literature

letters to boys ive loved - 2

letters to boys ive loved - 1 by patterninverted, literature

Literature

letters to boys ive loved - 1

this is a letter even if by patterninverted, literature

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this is a letter even if

someday. by patterninverted, literature

Literature

someday.

jezebel in the yard by patterninverted, literature

you blame yourself, right up by patterninverted, literature

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never grow up. by Pretty-As-A-Picture, literature

Literature

never grow up.

I have a monster living underneath my bed. He’s made up of burnt frog skin, white-red cobweb veined eyes and a collection of missing pebble teeth. Sometimes we play scrabble. (The first time he was just a mechanical hum beneath the bowing wooden planks, he was just a faint smell of green and he was just a hot cloud of fog around my lips. It’s the wind, it’s the wind, I breathed. Then he breathed back, heavy and loud and monster-like; AM NOT.) He always spoke in capitals; MONSTERS ARE MUCH TOO SCARY FOR LOWER-CASED LETTERS, he informed me one night under pink covers. I shined the flashlight into his eyes until they changed co

never trust a writer by neverwastewishes, literature

Literature

never trust a writer

It's best to stay far away from us writers. We're double-agents, and can't be trusted. You see, we just have this terrible privilege of not being able to tell the difference between reality and fiction. We sometimes forget that the emotions in our head might not run with as much passion as they really do, and then we get disappointed in things that make normal people happy. We're afraid to get close to people, and yet all we do is yearn for human contact. That's why we write about it, and that's why we lose touch on what it really feels like to be in a relationship. Writers often find that we don't fully comprehend the world around us, and,

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the hull was the first to go by patterninverted, literature

Literature

the hull was the first to go

we keep our limbs lonely like a new religion with our legs hanging off the end of the bed we bury it into the sheets and whisper resist the thought of what we did pestilence and disease had threatened to seize the sorrow we held for the dead she flips her hair as we give out oh, the ways that we were bled fatigue sets in; we've lead feet to tread fathomless grey waters with worry in our heads she softens up and takes the sail that billows in the wind and begs to trade her bloated body for a lighter one instead give me her pain in the magnet of a compass that could bring us back to shore and bludgeon her heart like wind on the

the hull was the first to go

patterninverted

About patterninverted

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Artist

Nov 30
United States
Deviant for 17 years
www.twitter.com/ashleeschultz
She / Her

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love, life, + breathing.

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patterninverted

Feb 5, 2010

so, who am i, really? a four year round-up.

0 min read

 i can't exactly tell you. as far as facts go, i've lived two decades. i was born and raised in chicago, but i've never quite embraced it. the tall buildings and broken chain-link fences scare me to death, but i march on, day by day, attending classes for journalism. but everyone knows that what looks good on paper is never really someone's self. that being said, my prose and poetry is inspired by various experiences. heartbreak and love and passion and fear seem to be central themes in my life. sometimes, i think too much and other times not enough. i feel my creativity gets the best of me in the wee hours of the morning. i am a bit of

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fervvent

May 2, 2012

thank you for the favourite (:
i like your style, though, it looks like you haven't really been around since 2010 - are you coming back or anything?

Gir-Gir

Oct 1, 2010

Do it:
FOLLOW THE INSTRUCTIONS -
DO NOT CHEAT
OR IT WON'T WORK AND
YOU WILL WISH YOU HADN`T.

TAKE 3 MINUTES
TRY THIS - IT WILL FREAK YOU OUT.

THE PERSON WHO SENT THIS TO ME SAID
HER WISH CAME TRUE 10 MINUTES AFTER SHE FORWARDED THE EMAIL

NO CHEATING !!!!

THIS GAME HAS A FUNNY / CREEPY OUTCOME.

DO NOT READ AHEAD, JUST DO IT.

IT TAKES ABOUT 3 MINUTES - WORTH A TRY

1st. Get PEN and PAPER

2nd. WHEN CHOOSING NAMES, MAKE SURE THEY ARE REAL PEOPLE THAT YOU ACTUALLY KNOW

3rd. GO WITH YOUR FIRST INSTINCTS !!!!! Very important for good results.

4th. SCROLL DOWN

ONE LINE AT THE TIME
DON`T READ AHEAD
otherwise
YOU WILL RUIN THE FUN.

1. On a blank sheet of paper, WRITE NUMBERS 1 through 11 in a COLUMN on the LEFT.

2. BESIDE the NUMBERS 1 & 2 ,

WRITE DOWN ANY
2 NUMBERS YOU WANT..

DO YOU HAVE A FAVORITE NUMBER?

3. BESIDE the NUMBERS 3 & 7 ,

WRITE DOWN THE NAMES OF TWO MEMBERS
OF THE OPPOSITE SEX.

CAUTION: DO NOT LOOK AHEAD or IT WILL NOT TURN OUT RIGHT

4. WRITE ANYONES NAME

(like FRIENDS or FAMILY...)
next to 4, 5, & 6 .

DON`T CHEAT OR YOU`LL BE UPSET THAT YOU DID

5. WRITE down FOUR SONG TITLES in 8, 9, 10, & 11

6. Finally,

MAKE A WISH

ARE YOU READY?
HERE IS THE

KEY TO THE GAME

1. THE NUMBER of PEOPLE YOU MUST TELL ABOUT THIS GAME is found in

SPACE 2

2. THE PERSON IN SPACE

3 IS THE ONE YOU LOVE

3. THE PERSON YOU LIKE but your relationship CANNOT WORK is in

SPACE 7

4. YOU CARE MOST about the PERSON you put in

SPACE 4

5. THE PERSON YOU NAME IN NUMBER 5 IS THE ONE WHO

KNOWS YOU VERY WELL.

6. THE PERSON YOU NAMED IN 6 IS YOUR

LUCKY STAR

7. THE SONG IN 8 IS THE SONG THAT MATCHES WITH THE

PERSON IN NUMBER 3

8. THE TITLE IN 9 IS THE SONG FOR THE

PERSON IN 7

9. THE 10 TH SPACE IS THE SONG THAT TELLS YOU MOST ABOUT

YOUR MIND

10. AND 11 IS THE SONG TELLING HOW YOU

FEEL ABOUT LIFE

11. NUMBER 1 IS YOUR

LUCKY NUMBER

SEND THIS TO A MINIMUM OF
10 PEOPLE
WITHIN AN HOUR OF READING THIS.

IF YOU DO, YOUR WISH WILL COME TRUE.

IF YOU FAIL TO, IT WILL BECOME THE OPPOSITE

STRANGE HOW IT SEEMS TO WORK.